What If All of This Were Real?
Some thoughts on the brink to 2023
A couple of days ago, I had an epiphany. It came after a week spent hanging out with A., who’s here in Steubenville for his college break. Three blessed weeks with my son, filled with board games and movie nights, laughter, brainy discussions, and sometimes emotional clashes. Hard-headed Germans that we both are, we sometimes get on each other’s nerves. It’s all good, though, because we also reconcile pretty easily.
However, amid all the exhilaration, I realized one thing: Now that A. is here, I’ve been slacking off on my religious commitments.
Following Fr. Mike Schmitz’s invitation to make this Advent and Christmas season a time of intense meditation and preparation, I had promised VatiGod* and myself to faithfully say my Rosary every day. Instead, I’m spending my evenings watching Rambo movies, playing board games, and surfing social media sites.
Meh, it’ll be fine, I tell myself, I’ll do it before bedtime, but by then I’m so tired that I push it off again. Tomorrow’s another day. I also skipped out on a few Daily Masses because it’s my week off and sometimes I just like to sleep in.
Another thing I’ve noticed about myself is that I can happily trust VatiGod to provide for me (“like the birds in the sky and the lilies in the field” and all that good stuff) but will go into total panic mode about money the instant I’m facing a big, unexpected expense.
All of a sudden, all bets are off. The generous gifts and financial aid I promised loved ones turn into “You better pay your own freakin’ way, sonny, because I sure ain’t.”
At some point, it finally hits me: I’m acting like it’s all not real. I’m acting as if the Bible is a storybook, a collection of fairytales or maybe useful fables for everyday life. I’m acting as if Jesus returning at any given moment (“like a thief in the night”) isn’t going to happen. I’m acting as if it’s safe to neglect VatiGod because I can make up for it tomorrow. Or the day after. Or the day after that. I’m acting as if Jesus saying, “Deny yourself, pick up your cross, and follow me” was just a suggestion.
I can live a holy life as long as it’s not too inconvenient. I can be super-devout and saintly unless I have something better to do.
How about you? Do you recognize yourself in any of these?
Do you ever skip your prayers and devotions because “life” gets in the way?
Are you making it a point to be kind to people… until someone really ticks you off?
Do you prioritize work over God because “that’s what pays the bills”?
Do you ever think about Jesus—or talk to Jesus—outside of Mass and your designated prayer time?
Have you ever caught yourself at Mass thinking about your shopping list or stuff you need to do today?
Do you try to accumulate as much money as possible for your retirement?
Do you freak out when the stock market is going down because it might hurt your 401(k)?
What percentage of your monthly income goes to your church and charitable causes?
If it’s God vs. family, does your family always come first?
Do you hit the Saturday afternoon Mass because that way, you’ve fulfilled your weekly obligation and can “take Sunday off”?
Do you put less in the collection basket than what you tip the waitress at your favorite restaurant?
When you get ready for Mass, are you thrilled and happy to go see Jesus, or do you go to church mostly for the fellowship and coffee hour?
Do you truly understand that it’s Jesus Himself in that tabernacle, or do you just pretend to believe it because “it’s what Catholics do”?
Do you behave as if your purpose in life were to know, to love, and to serve God? Or are you, despite good intentions, mostly loving and serving yourself?
If this afternoon, the day went from sunny blue skies to pitch black in an instant… if thunder, lightning, and earthquakes shook the world… if a gigantic glowing cross appeared in the sky, with rays of light coming down and piercing your soul… would you be ready to face Him?
If five minutes from now, a hidden blood clot made its way into your brain, or tonight your heart stopped in your sleep… would you be ready to face Him?
What would He say to you? Would His eyes look at you with joy and approval, or sadness and disappointment?
What would you do differently today if you REALLY believed it were all true? How would your life change?
These are tough questions to ask ourselves—and even tougher questions to answer. New Year’s Eve is coming up in a few days, so maybe we should all rethink our New Year’s resolutions. Instead of making a long list of do’s and don’ts, from eating less chocolate to finally fixing that broken fence, let’s whittle it down to “Believe God is real and Jesus is real and everything in the Bible is real, and act accordingly.”
I can only imagine the great things we’d do. Let’s rise to the challenge.
[*“Vati” means “Daddy” in German and is pronounced “Fuh-tee.”]